The dreams about her have subsided. I don’t think about her everyday as I have in years past and I’m needing to play old audio to remember her voice. Six years ago today, my oldest daughter, Makenzie — who is now my youngest — was invited into heaven. “Six years” is a long time as I think about all that has happened since. Great things. Hard things. Things to celebrate and things to mourn.
As I spend today in the back corner of a small-town coffee shop, I think about the word “restoration.” More-so, I think about what it takes to be restored. Brokenness first. Surrender second. Expertise third. Time last. Then, restoration births new life. That’s God’s way. He takes my broken and hurting heart for the loss of my child and calls it to surrender. He reaches out and holds my surrendered hands first to comfort, then to lead. With expertise, he chisels his way through the rocky attitudes and sorrows that surround death and over time, calls me to something greater. Pain is necessary for growth. Demolition is necessary for restoration.
So many emotions today. I’m expecting them. So many thoughts and mental wanderings will flood the hours. I’ll entertain them. It’s part of God’s restoration for me, and it is good.
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