For most, the holidays are wonderful times of celebrations with friends and family. But what if your family celebrations are filled with tension? I offer 5 tips on handling those stressful times.
On This Podcast:
This time of year can be wonderful. All of the events and celebrations with family should make us happy. But a recent survey said 24% of people are dreading seeing relatives during the holidays. That’s 76million people!
What if there was a way — this Christmas — that instead of dreading seeing crazy Uncle Ralph or that obnoxious cousin, that you felt good about getting together with them.
There is a solution! It comes from the Bible.
Romans 12:15-18. “Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all! Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all people.
And this is the key verse: “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with everyone.”
At the end of the day, have you done everything YOU can to be at peace with those family members?
How to do that?
- Ahead of time, think through the patterns. When you’re with that person, what starts the conversation going down the wrong path? What sets you off? If you think through ahead of time, you’ll be prepared to avoid – politics, religion whatever. They might not respond positively, but remember “as far as it depends on YOU.”
- “Kill them with encouragements.” Or compliments. Not falsely. You can say, “Interesting sweater. I like your hair. Great ham.” Just be authentic.
- Ask for help from them. Let’s say your getting gifts out of the car and you could carry all of them. Don’t. Go in and ask Uncle Fred for help. When you ask someone for help, it immediately forms a kindred between the two of you.
- Sometimes it might mean removing yourself from the situation.
- Predetermine to enjoy the gathering. This is the most powerful. Believe ahead of time that the gathering will be enjoyable. Speak it out loud. Your subconscious mind will go into the family gathering believing that it will be great. When the negative comments from your mother in law start to fly, your subconscious mind will try to reconcile the difference by 1st, reminding you of your commitment to make it a great event, then help you remember how to respond with peace.
I believe that this year’s christmas gatherings are going to be great for you because you’re the smartest podcast audience out there and you are dedicated to talking Romans serious, as far as it depends on you, be a peace with everyone!
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2 thoughts on “023: 5 Tips On Handling Your Family During The Holidays – Todd Stocker.com”
Todd great tips for the holidays. Renee and I enjoyed listening to you today! We’ve definitely experienced those in the past and probably will again in the future. Keep up the good advice. Hope to see you at my mother’s 90th party on the afternoon of the 28th.
Thanks Chuck! Yes, families are both wonderful and interesting! Merry Christmas!