Confessions Of An Inept Father

Yesterday was Father’s Day. For me, I’ve always enjoyed that day because it reminds me how inept I am as a dad.

Let me explain.

Like you, I have this “Father” image in my head of how my role should impact my family. Descriptors like “Strong,” “Unwavering,” “Spiritual Leader,” “Superman” bombard my thinking. Who knows from where some of those words came, but it seems I never can measure up to them.

But here’s the good thing. I don’t have to. In fact, I can’t. There are no perfect dads out there … none … I included. Each of us takes on that role in different ways, usually based on the modeling we had of a dad figure in our lives at some point. There are parts of my parenting that have been great and fun. Other times have been disappointing, challenging, and embarrassing. But all in all, I know I tried and keep trying to help guide my kids (now adults) in the stages of their lives.

Somewhere along the line, I succumbed to the fact that I cant do and be it all for my kids. As a dad, I don’t have to be perfect, just authentic with my kids (and wife, for that matter.) They don’t need me to be a superstar or a celebrity; they just need me to be their dad. They don’t need me to pretend to have it all together or know everything about everything. They just need to know I am following Jesus as simply I can.

Paul encourages us in the Bible with these words,

“Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do because you are his dear children. Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ.”
Ephesians 5:1,2

Dads (and moms), in words from a movie, “Do your best and leave the results up to God.”

Final thought: Every year on Father’s Day, I listen to a song written in 1994 by Phillips, Craig, and Dean called “I Want To Be Just Like You.”

The song always reminds me to keep imitating who Jesus is in my life so my kids can continually learn how much God loves us.

Here is the video with the words underneath:

He climbs in my lap for a goodnight hug

He calls me Dad, and I call him Bub

With his faded old pillow and a bear named Pooh

He snuggles up close and says, “I want to be like you.”

I tuck him in bed, and I kiss him goodnight

Trippin’ over the toys as I turn out the light

And I whisper a prayer that someday he’ll see

He’s got a father in God ’cause he’s seen Jesus in me.

Lord, I want to be just like You

‘Cause he wants to be just like me

I want to be a holy example

For his innocent eyes to see

Help me be a living Bible, Lord

That my little boy can read

I want to be just like You

‘Cause he wants to be like me

Got to admit I’ve got so far to go

Make so many mistakes, and I’m sure that You know

Sometimes it seems no matter how hard I try

With all the pressures in life, I just can’t get it all right

But I’m trying so hard to learn from the best

Being patient and kind, filled with Your tenderness

‘Cause I know that he’ll learn from the things that he sees

And the Jesus he finds will be the Jesus in me

Right now, from where he stands, I may seem mighty tall

But it’s only ’cause I’m learning from the best Father of them all